What Now, Sara Lee?

 

      I can honestly say that the only things my mother has handed down to me are size 11 feet, fine hair, small boobs (Thanks a lot, Mom), and this amazing chocolate buttercream frosting recipe. She first taught me how to make it when I was 7, but like everything else from my childhood, I chose to not remember. Really, it wasn't until I created this blog that I asked her for some recipes. As mentioned earlier, she only gave me one recipe- the buttercream frosting. I guess that's another thing I get from my mother: the inability to cook. Of course I would never mention this to her face, just on the internet where I'm certain she won't find it because I think she's still learning how to turn on the actual computer. This is why I'm the least favorite of her children.

       Since apparently eating frosting by itself is frowned upon, I guess I have to make something to go with it. Usually, I just buy a brownie mix, top it with this simple frosting, tell people the brownies were purchased from a bakery, and call it a day. However, I somehow developed a baking conscience in the past month (What do you mean those fell on the floor? So I can't double dip?), I won't take the easy way out. Thanks to my good ol' "Kitcheny-Cricket", (Ugh, horrible pun) I went ahead and baked a pound cake to accompany my chocolate frosting. Since I'm all of a sudden coming clean, I might as well tell you that the pound cake is better than the frosting. The only person who didn't agree was my father, but if it's worth anything, this is a man who drinks a liter of Coke a day and sucks in potato chips like he's a damn Dyson vacuum. I don't care what he says, the pound cake and chocolate frosting go together like "lamb and tuna fish".

"Vanilla Pound Cake"

Ingredients: 

• 1 1/2 c. flour
• 1/4 tsp. baking soda
• 1/4 tsp. salt
• 3/4 c. softened butter
• 1 c. sugar
• 1 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract 
• 2 large eggs
• 1/2 c. sour cream

Directions: 

1. Preheat to 325. Lightly grease and flour a loaf pan
2. In medium bowl, whisk flour baking soda, and salt
3. In a separate bowl beat together butter, sugar, and vanilla until fluffy
4. Add eggs one at a time and mix until completely blended
5. Mix in half of the flour mixture into the wet ingredients and stir until both are incorporated 
6. Stir in sour cream and add the rest of the flour mixture and blend
7. Pour batter into prepared pan and bake for 75-80 minutes or until knife comes out clean

"Chocolate Butter Cream Frosting"

Ingredients: 

• 1/2 c. softened butter (1 stick)
• 3-4 c. powdered sugar
• 1 tsp. vanilla extract
• 2 tbls. milk or heavy cream
• 1/2 c. unsweetened cocoa powder

Directions:

1. In mixing bowl combine butter, milk, and vanilla, and beat until creamy. Next add powdered sugar and mix until fluffy
2. Add in cocoa powder and blend well. Add more cocoa powder depending on the amount of chocolate you want in frosting
3. If frosting is too thick add more heavy cream. Alter consistency with powdered sugar (thick) and milk (thin). 

              This frosting is decadent and practically goes with anything. It's comparable to a vintage Chanel bag. However, if you're like me who is neither classy, rich, nor has any idea what that above phrase even means, it's more like sex. The only difference is that you'll probably want to work out after eating the frosting. Or just have really good sex.
              Thank you to Honey and Butter for the simple yet delicious pound cake recipe! Another round of thanks to my mother for the frosting. You may not have given me killer abs or a fast metabolism, but you sure as shit did give me a pretty awesome buttercream recipe.

              Number of Pinterest recipes conqured:10
              I declare this recipe a: "eat-the-whole-thing-in-one-sitting-and-lie-about-it" kind of cake